Happy New Years!

2011 was a year of change for me. I left a job that I despised. I moved across the country. I decreased my income by 70-80%. I went from spending no time outdoors to working outdoors daily. It’s been amazing how those changes have impacted my personality.  I have noticed I am becoming more extroverted, more willing to take risks and more willing to be vulnerable. I am suddenly ok with being noticed. I am so happy that this is the direction my life is heading.

So, it won’t come as a surprise to anyone that knows me that I am a goal setter. The feeling of accomplishing a goal seems to give my life purpose. Unfortunately, that means that when I am not working towards a goal I tend to feel aimless and sometimes get depressed. I have decided that I have some specific things to accomplish this year and to get there, I want to set some goals. So, without further ado…

2012 Goals

Trapeze- These goals will require video proof to be considered accomplished, I will post videos as each item is completed.

  • Catch my hocks salto- This is going to take some work, I need to get more consistent and right now I am opening under the catch trap.
  • Throw a catchable double.
  • Choreograph and complete a full routine on silks, static, and double trap.
Glass- To consider these goals accomplished, I will be posting pictures to a lampworking forum that I frequent and to get the opinion of the experts. I’ll post the pictures and reactions here as well.
  • Learn to fume
  • Conquer honeycombs
  • Attempt inside/out work
  • Blog less guarded and more often (1x a week)- being a perfectionist, I don’t like to show myself in any light that is less than flattering, but that stuff is life too. It’s time to bring down my walls. I am not perfect and I shouldn’t represent myself as such, doing so only leads to others unrealistic expectations of me and heartbreak.
  • Focus on fitness- I have been pretty good about this over the last 6 months. My job and my goals require me to be in strong and in decent shape and I know my weight sometimes holds me back physically and more often mentally, I want that obstacle gone.
  • Take a life coaching class- I have been thinking about this a lot lately. I think I was meant to teach in some manner. I really enjoy it at the trapeze rig and I feel like I should be doing more instructional stuff in some manner and I think where ever this path leads, a life coaching class will be beneficial.
So, to get these goals accomplished, I will be setting monthly goals that support or become stepping stones for the yearly goals. So, here are my January goals, in no particular order:
January Goals
  • Workout 5 days a week
  • Sit in left and right splits 1 minute a day
  • Blow glass 4x a week
  • Take my splits out of lines- I don’t need the lines, it’s a mental thing so it’s time.
  • Work on a return from the catch- this is one of those things that I let my weight mentally get in the way of. I think I am too heavy to catch, so I am here 5 years later and I have never returned to the bar from a catch.
  • Learn 2 tricks on each silk and static.

Hot Weekend

I spent the weekend working and it was hot! I struggled a bit on Saturday with the heat, but had no issues on Sunday. I was pulling lines at the trapeze rig- man, I love my job. Unfortunately, I haven’t been flying much because my shoulder has been giving me problems. But, sometimes just hanging around the rig makes me feel good. I have really been trying to get into better shape so I can do more. It’s frustrating because my body loses weight so slowly.

It’s a “money’s tight” kind of weekend so it’s been low key. Along with working I’ve been reading books, mowing the lawn, housework, and catching up on sleep. So, here it is Sunday night and I feel like I have some of my shit in order. We were going to try to get in a “hike” (Florida is FLAT so hike is a relative term) tonight, but the thunderstorms rolled in, killing our plans. I guess it’s time for a workout and a pedicure and another night to bed early!

Enjoy the last few hours of your weekend!

Life Lessons- Learning To Add

I was taught to add by two important people in my life. The first was Mrs. Rasmussen, my first grade teacher. I honestly don’t remember much about her and her teaching style. I remember her salt and pepper hair. I also remember that we used objects, like apples, to demonstrate how to add. As with most subjects in school, after learning the basics, the concept stuck and I never had much trouble with math after that. I used basic adding and subtracting in my life without thinking much about it. At least I thought I was using it.

When I was 31, Beast taught me how to add again. He taught me how that basic math that I learned when I was 6 could, or more accurately SHOULD, be applied in relationships. In any type of relationship there are 2 people who interact. All of those interactions are like deposits and withdrawals in a bank account. The good things are deposits and the bad are withdrawals. Obviously for a relationship to be successful, that account should be in the black, not the red. However, we are complicated people with lives full of stress and busy schedules. We make mistakes that may be small withdrawls or large ones. Sometimes it can be a while before we make our next deposit. Maybe a small fee will incur for neglect, but as long as we are not making many or large withdrawals, the account should be stable.

So often in this world we walk around with the attitude of “What have you done for me lately?” We lose sight of all the wonderful things the relationship is built on because we are not getting the attention we believe we deserve or we felt we were done wrong. Often times we throw away a relationship that we shouldn’t or we keep one that should be tossed. If you apply the math, you should know always know where the relationship stands. Is the debt, not recoverable, or is it just a small hit to the bottom line?  This system makes a relationship less complicated. I know what I value in a relationship and I let others know what I value.  They also know what things have a negative value. If a relationship is often in the red, it is time to walk away. And, of course, if the account is usually in good standing, it’s a keeper. And, when I meet someone who cannot add, I know to keep on walking if possible. If not, I know to be careful to protect myself.

Do you use math in your relationships? Tell me what works for you.

Happy Labor Day!

So, it’s Labor Day. I’ve been working all weekend so it’s nice that today is a day off. Since it’s Labor Day, I thought it would be good to talk about what I do. I am a trapeze instructor. This job is a dream job for me. I am so thrilled that I get to share my love of trapeze with others. I get to be outside and help encourage others to try something new, exciting, and sometimes scary. The number one priority of my job is to keep people safe. Sometimes I work the safety lines and sometimes I work the board helping people take off.

The best part of my job is watching people stare fear in the face and overcome it. By far, the most common phrase I hear is “I am afraid of heights”. The truth is, according to Wikipedia and other online sources, only 2-5% of the general population suffers from acrophobia or an extreme/irrational fear of flying. However, some polls show the percentage of fear of heights to be in the 40-50% range. When I am working the board I hear it from closer to 80% of people. I regularly see tears, terror and fear in the faces of many people after they climb the ladder to the platform. And after the swing I see triumph, joy, and exhilaration. That is amazing!

Beast has been coming to some of our classes lately to do some photography projects. This is a time lapse photography video of the catching portion of the 10 am class on 9/4/2011. All photos and video created by Beast.


[vimeo http://www.vimeo.com/28597062]

So, do you love what you do and do what you love? If not, what would be your dream job?

More Trapeze

Today was a gorgeous Florida day. The temps were 85-95, and there was cloud cover. I had another fun day flying.

I also spent some time today creating a new circuit training workout as the one I’ve been doing is getting stale. I’ve been using the Seconds app on my phone. You enter the intervals and their time and point it at your playlist and viola! You have a trainer. Love it!

So, while I was poking around the interwebs looking for new exercises, I stumbled across this website: http://www.bodyrock.tv/. These workouts are nuts and Zuzana is ripped. I know, with the skimpy outfits and heavy panting, I am not their target market… but I think I’ve found some seriously challenging new workouts. Also, I want that sandbag!


Trapeze Tuesday

I had a staff fly this afternoon. It’s still really hot out,  but we had fun in spite of the heat.

Today was a take it easy kind of day, but I am back to recording my practices so I can critique them and get better.

So here is the good, the bad, and the ugly:

The Good:

Well, this is the hard part cause I am super critical of myself. However, I am staying on the bar longer that I have been during my half turns and I like how my takeoffs are looking.

The Bad:

I’m turning off the bar during my half turn

The huge split I seem to be doing in my turn. What is that???

The Ugly:

Letting go a gazillion seconds too early in my straight jump.

Well, I’ll be back on the bar on Thursday, I’ll keep working at it.

The Beginning

Work was getting stressful. Thursday, February 10, 2005 was a rough day. It was almost 7pm, I was still at work and I was exhausted. The Beast, formerly know as QA K, had come by to say hi. At that point, Infant Developer (ID) delivered some bad news to me about a project that was not going as planned (more accurately a project he had royally screwed up) and my eyes welled up with tears. Seeing this, QA K distracted ID with a bright shinny object and made motions at me: You, me, drinks, get’n the fuck outta here! Knowing this was the opportunity I had dreamed about (while doodling hearts on my notebook and writing Mrs. Jenferner Beast over and over) I jumped up, shut off my pc and grabbed my purse in one fluid motion.

We met at Chili’s where we proceeded to order food we couldn’t eat. We stared at it with absolutely no appetite. Really, the last time a crush caused me to lose my appetite was when I was 14! We finally gave up on trying to eat and spent a lot of time looking at each other and drinking nervously. It’s been said before but I’m gonna say it again, we were fully retarded! At some blurry point in the conversation Beast grabbed my hand. My heart stopped. That was the end of the beginning.

Big Love Baby!

It’s a new year so what’s next?

I have to be honest, I have been a little depressed since the 3 day. I always get that way after a big event. I always have that feeling of, “ok, so now what do I do?” This time it was worse than ever. I was feeling like I was missing something in my life. After parsing that out, I realized I was not doing much to change the world I live in. I bitch a lot about how people suck, but I don’t do a lot to try to make the world a better place to live in. I do the regular stuff, like shop at local markets and mom and pop places, I hold the elevator for people, and I even let people cut in front of me in line for the off ramp. But, the 3 Day always makes me feel like I am contributing to the greater good of the world, I always miss that. So, I decided to volunteer with a Lab Rescue organization. I don’t have a lot of time on my hands, but I can help out at adoption events and walk dogs that are living in boarding facilities while waiting for a foster home.  I decided to do this because my lab brings me much joy. Speaking of, here is a picture of Annabelle from earlier today (click on image for full size photo).

Other things on my agenda for the next year:

  • More Trapeze!
  • Hiking/Backpacking
  • More glass work
  • Running
  • 2009 3 Day
  • Lab Rescuers volunteering

Lately, K and I have been kicking around the idea of a thru-hike of some kind like the PCT, ADT, or the AT. Not necessarily a this year goal, we have some prep work to do. But in that spirit we took the dogs on their first hike today. They had a blast. We went to Cottonwood Creek Falls, an easy 2 mile hike.

When we reached the falls the dogs jumped right in. There were some hairy moments with wet dogs on slippery rocks, but once they learned to be cautious they were loving it. We packed a lunch and ate by the falls, the weather was perfect and there was no one around.

We finished the day at home with a bowl of warm chili and corn bread muffins as the doggies slept soundly and happily at our feet. I think it’s gonna be a good year!

The 2008 3 Day

Well, it’s two weekends after my second 3 Day experience- my feet have healed and my muscles have recovered but the afterglow lives on. I love the 3 Day Utopia. It is a world like no other. It is a world where people look out for one another, a world where people thank you for doing what you can to help. And, in turn, you thank them for their support. It is a world where men and women wear bras on the outside of their clothes. A world where  girl dress up as prostitutes and drive a van around town with “Hookers for Hooters!” written on it, play loud music and get out and dance with the walkers.

Here are a few ways the real world is different from the 3 Day world:

When there is an obstruction in the walking path, like a sign pole, other walkers will yell, “POLE!” so that those behind them will not walk into it.In the real world if there is a pole in your walking path and you are not paying attention you are screwed.  

While you are walking, people in cars often honk to show support. Now, the proper response to this is a wave (and a smile if you can muster it). In the non-3 Day world, the honking cars are doing at you while walking is NOT to show support, however the proper response to this is also a wave and a smile (you just use less fingers in this wave). 

And, in the real world, there are no San Jose Cops on bikes riding along side of you with music blaring, shaking thier booties and telling you how awesome you are.  There are no friends and family members (and total strangers) holding signs and clapping for you. Ok, the friends and family are probably supporting you in a more oblique way, but the cops and the total strangers probably could care less. 

Highlights from this year’s walk:

  • 11 million dollars raised for Breast Cancer Research in San Diego alone!
  • approximately 500 men walking in San Diego this year!
  • My amazing boyfriend made team shirts including this one that got our team lots of attention from the San Jose boys and got a couple of the teammates on the news: 


Our team had two new teammates, Connie and Jennie. There was Nicole who I had not yet met (since I did not walk in 2007). Bonnie, Janetta and Tia were all returning walkers and we picked up a new teammate the day of the walk, Annamarie. We split into a fast walker group and a slow walker group so that everyone had a pace they were comfortable with and no one walked alone.  I was walking with the slow group. In fact, at one point in time I was the last walker on the route!  

 Team Photo 

K, as usual, was out supporting me and my teammates. Celina, (a friend and co-worker of K,  and a friend of mine who also bought my last house, small world huh?) was also out cheering us on both Friday and Saturday.  She was very supportive in many ways and it was very much appreciated! Celina and K brought out the dogs (wearing our team shirts) on Saturday. They were holding this sign:undefined 

Well, everyone walking by saying,  “We LOVE Sunshine, how do you know her?” K would always smile and answer, “She’s my girlfriend.” That response got him many puzzled looks. So, when we arrived and he told me about all the people he had talked to about “Sunshine” me and my girls laughed hysterically. You see, we had met Sunshine. She was this sweet old lady (probably in her 70’s). We passed her 3 or 4 times that day, she doesn’t walk very fast, she shuffled along each day with her purse and we assume she was taking sweep vans when it all got to much for her, but she smiled through the whole walk.    

Here is a picture of Sunshine:


And finally a picture from closing ceremonies, notice who is walking with our team at the far right (click on the picture for full size image):

closing ceremonies  

And, of course I am already signed up for next years walk, click below if you would like to donate!